Finally Feeling 40

I've been 40 for 10 months and 5 days.

It's a funny feeling to be this age and yet in so many ways I feel new and fresh- like I haven't truly been living until now. I don't know if I can accurately put it into words, but I'm going to try.

I've reached a new level of maturity, yet I'm embracing my youthful qualities that got shoved in a dark corner for a long time because someone or something made me feel like they were wrong/foolish/bad.

I've discovered parts of me that I didn't know existed. Parts that break the mold I somehow made for myself without making me someone different. It's like I got an upgrade.

I find myself to be more fragile than I realized. I'm more humble. Yet somehow I'm also stronger and more confident than I ever have been.

I'm learning to not take myself so seriously and have more fun. And this is helping me not take what others say to heart quite as much as I used to.

I'm frequently reminded that not everything is black and white, and in the messy gray is where the true growth happens. Except, it's not really gray at all. It's more like a symphony of color that you only discover once you're in the thick of it. It's beautiful.

So as I approach 41, I'm finally feeling 40. And also, 20...maybe 30. I've got too much life in me to be even close to being "old".

Also, I'm kinda obsessed with this TikTok filter. 😜